Archive for the ‘Uncategorized’ Category

loose end learning

Posted: May 26, 2011 in Uncategorized

The book was not that remarkable, aside from the compelling title. It was about a little Inuit girl going clam fishing somewhere in the north. The title, however, was very catching: The Very Last First Time.

Things are only truly novel one time. They may be enjoyable, fun or even exciting, after they become routine, but they can never become new again. You only have one first time.

My first year at college is completed, accomplished, lived and I can never relive even a second of it. I have experienced my full and complete, very last, first year at college. What a year it was.

I uprooted from quiet Monterey and transplanted myself into Chicago’s south-side. I had glimpses and ideas of what to expect and that was foolish. The best moments, without a doubt, were the times when I forgot to worry about my expectations and chose to embrace the moment.

I like to think that I became a seasoned CTAer, at least in some regards. I logged a lot of miles, a lot of time, a lot of memories on the buses and trains. Starting with those first few times, when I skulked around in a whelming flood of oversensitivity and fear. And culminating with yesterday, when the sky was dark with thunderstorms and my fellow passengers & I commiserated about the lightning and rain. We were all going, not to mention coming, from different places, yet, we were able to connect, laugh, talk, for a short time, as the droplets streaked across the windows and the water splashed loudly underneath the wheels. Every stop we welcomed new, wet friends, and said goodbye to those that were departing.
The thing about the CTA is that it will be a part of my life for as long as I am a student. More faces and stories are yet to be seen and heard on the redline tracks (at least, I sincerely hope so.)

The office. Much has already been said about this place that defined my life for the past five months (not in this post but past ones). At some point I realized that I was here, and decided to make the most of it. More could be said, but even as I prepare to leave, I hardly feel as though it is concluded.

Needless to say, school is not over, it is just on a break. Yes, it is (shockingly, amazingly, unbelievably) 25% complete. But it is not completely finished, just for now; sometimes, however, done for now can feel a lot like done for good. In a way, school as I experienced it this year, is gone forever. I will be in the dorms and involved on campus life much more in the fall: no more long commutes to evening classes, no more eight week terms, and no more classes with people from the community. It will be a different place that welcomes me come august, but not a completely foreign place. Autumn will feel a lot more like building a second story than laying a new foundation.

As this final week dawned on me, I decided I needed to conclude correctly; to make it to the end of the week and be able to hand myself a perfectly wrapped gift entitled: your first year at college.

Only, I’ve been tired when I was spending time with friends. And I overslept one morning. And I missed a bus and had to stand out in the rain. And my rope is not completely congealed at the end; in fact it is a little frayed.

But, that is life.

I have come to the end of year one. Moments and milestones have been stored away as memories, and I will begin building again in the fall. No, not everything started, happened, or ended the way I might have planned it. In the end, however, I have learned more lessons than I can count. But it has been loose end learning. Not wrapped up nicely for me, nor meted out so I could always stand up during the process. No, it’s been loose and inconclusive and unfinished and fully beautiful.

I have a hunch that the Chicago grindstone has not finished wearing me down. There will be more pain, more tears, more strife & struggling and in the midst of that the joys will get higher and higher and I will barely be able to breathe from the altitude.

Bring it on.

seed

Posted: February 6, 2011 in Uncategorized

In the fall a seed was planted in my mind. The seed of writing. I thought about it, spoke about it, and did it. I wrote a lot more than I ever have before; and I enjoyed it. That seed is still there, but it’s different. If you had been keeping up with “A Life Tri-Chotomized” you may be wondering where it is. So am I.

Is it that I don’t want to write anymore? No.

Perhaps it is that I am simply too busy? Yes, partly, but that’s not the only reason.

I think that my focus has changed a bit. See a seed is a beautiful thing. They are intricate, delicate and amazing. It’s hard to fathom the intense structure and design of a seedpod. What can sometimes be lost in this is the purpose of the seed in the first place. To quote Jesus on the subject, “Truly, truly, I say to you, unless a grain of wheat falls into the earth and dies, it remains alone; but if it dies, it bears much fruit” (John 12:24). A seed must die for it to accomplish its goal; namely, bearing fruit.

What am I trying to say, is this blog dead? No.

However, it is going to change. The seed of writing was planted in my head, but that seed must die in order to bear fruit. If I were to spend my free time writing blog posts, I would not have much time to invest in people. While I am still have some crazy experiences here in Chicago (and I will try to recount some of them from time to time), I want to focus more on the people, and my interactions with them.

I am living a life tri-chotomized, but my dream is to become a man tri-chotomized. That I would be able to interact with, invest in and love those people who are playing an integral part in this divergent year.

How exactly does this seed analogy apply? I want to transition from writing about life here, to living life here. The seed needs to die, in order to bear the fruit of genuinely loving people. My goal is not to be 33.3 to infinite% Jorgen everywhere I go, I want to be 100% Jorgen everywhere I go.

With that said, I will commence with blogging as often as time and circumstances allow. To start with I will write three posts exemplifying, hopefully, what a life tri-chotomized looks like as I move into the future. Look for them in the next few days…

welcome back

Posted: January 15, 2011 in Uncategorized

Many a movie sequel tagline invites the watcher to return, remember, reinvent, or reprise their experience from the previous film; to go back and relive, albeit for a moment, their life in that other world. This emphasis on “re” experience is necessary because a movie, done correctly, should come to a conclusion that does not need any addition. A sequel breaks into that conclusion and asserts that, in fact, more is needed, and the viewer will find it very much to their liking to return.

This is neither a movie sequel nor a tagline.

I write this blog because I enjoy expressing myself through the art form of writing; therefore, it is not for entirely altruistic reasons. On the other hand, if I wrote it for myself only then I would not publish it in a public forum such as the internet, I intend for it to be both read and enjoyed. The question I need ask of myself, then, is twofold: are there still aspects of my life that I want to express in writing? And what would entice someone to return to this blog in 2011?

Since I answer the first question in the positive, and have no grasp on the second one I shall commence, again, with A Life Tri-Chotomized. In so doing I hope that this will not be an escape so much as a slice of reality, an encouragement to live where one is.

If you choose to return, know that I will do my best to recreate an image of Chicago from my perspective. As the old adage says “A picture is worth a thousand words” and since I’m no photographer, the only option for me is to write, and write a lot.

I finally did it. I crossed the one threshold that was holding me back from being a true college student. The list is something like this:

  1. Attend a college class.***********************************Check
  2. Turn in a paper.****************************************Check
  3. Do a quiz/exam.****************************************Check
  4. Get a meal through your school’s food service.****************Check
  5. Make friends with people at school.************************Check
  6. Hang out with friends from school outside of a class setting.*****Check
  7. Study for long hours in your school’s library.******************Check
  8. Complete a college level course.****************************Check

I can now check off the final thing on the list
9.  Stay up all night writing a paper.***************************Check

Staying up all night was something that I had fought doing, I was determined to be on top of my assignments and not let the need arise to lose my sleep. Needless to say, I lost that battle; on Monday night I went to bed on Tuesday morning at 5AM.

This is just one of many things that I boldly claimed, either vocally or mentally, upon moving to Chicago and that I have subsequently been proven wrong about.

Claim: You never need to chase after a bus; another one will be coming along soon.
Correction: I chase buses, or run to the bus stop almost every day now; because, sometimes that other bus is just not going to cut it.

Claim: If you plan correctly, you never need to be in a hurry.
Correction: Train schedules, late buses, weather delay, technical difficulties, etc., there are many things that you do not control, and cannot account for.

Warning: Watch out for the black ice.
Claim: I don’t need to watch out for ice, ice can only be fun.
Correction: Try running to work, late, in dress shoes, on ice. Let me know how many times you slip, and we’ll compare records.

Claim: Everything that anyone said about the cold was overrated. (Yes, I actually said that)
Correction: No, actually what people said was not overrated. And, yes, it is fantastically (preposterously) cold.  For instance, it is 19 degrees outside right now, but with wind chill it feels like 6. When I came, I did not have a hat or gloves, I now have a hat and gloves, and it’s still cold.

I came, I spoke big, and now, as I end my first semester, i am corrected.